just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Randomize
