That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
That's intense
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
