Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize