I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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