So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
