If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
