At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
