Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
