I'm so fucking centered right now
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize