...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
