im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
