I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
