i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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