Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize