We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
