dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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