I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
