Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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