I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
