remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
you never un-have a 4some
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
