I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize