so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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