I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
