that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
