I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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