this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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