You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
