I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
