he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
