You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
