come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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