the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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