At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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