let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
