If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
