I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
