uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
