Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize