ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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