omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You pole danced in your parka.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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