if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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