i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
