ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize