dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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