why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Randomize
