Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize