I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
