Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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