We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize