No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
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