Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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