Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
